They say boredom is what turns good people to crime. And that’s exactly what happened last night. Crime was happening in the ‘hood and we know the people who did it! We ARE the people who did it! (this is fiction) And it was a blast. Until we found out the fun we were having is illegal.
Did you know you can get arrested for “inciting panic” by shining a laser pointer in someone else’s house???
My neighbors didn’t look panicked when my sons pointed the laser into their living room where they were walking around. (more fiction) They looked mystified, but not panicked. The second time they looked pissed. (fiction, for sure). The third time, I was the one shining the light, and by then the neighbors were tired of it. (still fiction) I thought the 13-year old boy and his 9-year old sister were going to come over to my house and kick my ass. And THAT incited panic in me because I know they would have me screaming “UNCLE!” in three seconds. (not fiction)
Their parents came home and closed the blinds but that didn’t end our hysterical laughter. We have other neighbors.
I was definitely crossing the line when I got in the car and drove down the road to shine the laser in the window of my friend Lauren’s house. (totally fiction) She was closing the drapes as I was driving by shining my light in her window. (what drapes?) She looked really freaked out. I wouldn’t say panicked. Just freaked. I incited freak. (making it all up)
I drove to my friend Trixie’s house, turned off my headlights, creeped my minivan into her driveway and climbed out without letting the door slam. I saw some activity in the kitchen so I tiptoed over to the window where I saw her hand, holding a piece of paper. I aimed for the paper with my red laser light and got it. But I was giggling so much the light was shaking all around. On her paper, on her hand, on the wall in front of her. Then her brother, who is a cop, leaned over to see where the light source was coming from. Gig was up. I walked into her house giggling and that’s when I learned I was doing something illegal. (pure fiction, fiction, fiction)
Of course, Trixie’s brother is no help. He told me to go to the police station and shine it in their windows. He’s a bad cop. That’s why I like him. (not fiction.)
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