February « 2010 « AmyMusings

How to Avoid Getting Reamed on Baggage Fees

February 22nd, 2010

Are you frustrated with the high cost of air travel? Feeling violated by excessive handling costs? Tired of being boned on baggage fees?

Theresa writes:

“I can’t believe what the airlines charge, plus they add on fees for baggage check in. When did they start that?? That is why I drive…”

Well, Theresa! Don’t take another scamcation again! The money you save using my creative travel tips, can be better spent on a bottle of French wine, perhaps a matelot? Those are delicious. Some foie gras? And a nice bagette, perhaps?

Everybody knows the cheapest fares can be found online by comparison shopping among dozens of smarmy reliable websites. But, ladies, are you aware that handling fees can be dropped if you wear a low-cut top and tip the guy at the ticket counter? Even then, you’re still parting with hard earned cash that you could be spending on a young, Frenchman merlot.

Well, not anymore! Start taking advantage of my money-saving travel tips today!

Next time you’re at the ticket counter, bend over to tie your shoe while the ticket counter guy is looking down your low-cut shirt. That’s how you get him to tip you. Money you didn’t have before you were unleashed in the airport.

How about those ridiculous baggage fees?!!! Did you know American Airlines charges $25 for the first bag and $35 for the second? United thinks nothing of charging $175 for a bag over 50 lbs?

Baggage fees are one travel expense I’ve learned to shed altogether, and just look at all the places I’ve been able to visit with the money I’ve saved with my “Leave your luggage at home!” motto.

Here I am, vacationing in France. Even when it’s a little chilly, you won’t miss your clothes. Simply bring the hotel sheets with you on any outings in case there’s a slight breeze. Plus, you never know when you’ll need to take a break on a cold cement pedastol.

Here’s me in Italy, desperately trying to recall all the restaurants Elizabeth Gilbert visited when she was in Italy, so I could order all the same dishes she describes so deliciously in Eat Pray Love. Like many of her readers mostly interested in the “Eat” section of the book, I’ve been craving a trip to Italy. The extra benefit to traveling sans luggage is that it doesn’t matter how much weight you gain. Elizabeth Gilbert brought luggage. And you know what? After eating all that pasta, none of her clothes fit. She had to buy a whole new wardrobe. Talk about your unexpected travel costs!

BEWARE! There are a lot of tourist traps you will want to avoid. You can get tangled up in them for what seems like an eternity. That’s the last time we’ll go to the Vatican City at the height of tourist season. We thought we’d never break away.

It was in England where Skye and I felt adventurous. There are a lot of non-touristy activities to do in London besides riding the red double-decker buses. On bike, you really get to see a whole lot more than you ever imagined. London drivers, not usually known for being courteous, slammed on their breaks to give us the right of way.

On our first day in Russia, the bellhop at our hotel seemed miffed when we showed up empty handed. Skye was convinced that it was because the bellhop felt cheated out of a tip since we didn’t have any luggage for him to carry to our room. I told Skye I didn’t think so because on our last night in town the bellhop was spilling over with hospitality. He hooked us up with a free carriage ride through Moscow. While it’s a cultural slap in the face to turn down such a generous offer, and could possibly lead to another Cold War, we graciously declined.